Friday, January 23, 2009

Level Ground

It's 11:25 on a Friday night. The time when the party set is just getting warmed up. Bands are playing their best sets, hook-ups are firming, groups of girlfriends are tightening their bonds, and the guys going home alone are just getting the clue they may have to settle or lose out.

I'm sitting in my living room, lights off, glow from the laptop two feet in front of me, Road to Perdition in High Def 15 feet in front of me. It's an oddly symmetrical scene from my vantage point. My coffee sits awaiting breaks in the flow of words, slowly cooling, not caring that I'd rather have it as hot as it came out of the pot. It's usually at this point when deep thoughts bubble up and give me pause. Thoughts about the future and where I might be going; thoughts about the past and where I've been; remembrance of the fierce loyalty of friends and the bitter betrayals of those thought to be; speculation on current acquaintances; joy in the sure knowledge of trust given and received to and by a precious few.

I realize, all in all, there's balance. I'm not necessarily thrilled with every twist and turn I've taken through life, nor the paths I've been forced down. But the hard times have made me strong, and the good times have buoyed me when I've needed it most. There are few people I trust completely, and they know who they are. There are a few more that I let in to a degree, and I'm fine with what I allow. There are many who are arm's length and will remain so. I don't imagine I'm any different in this regard from most who would read this; only the details would be different, but life in and of itself is the same sort of roller coaster for all of us. It's how we deal with the ride that defines us. My advice? Stay on. Let it finish. You'll find yourself on level ground on a Friday night sometime while the rest of the world is riding. Take advantage of the break before the next run, don't hesitate when it's time to get on again, and.....

......enjoy the ride.